I knew him through my family and hadn't seen him in a while. Since then I've messed around with more girls than I can count, but I have never dated a girl that I knew I couldn't marry - because ultimately that is what I want.
We were making the standard mundane small talk about how I was liking school and college life, when the conversation took an interesting turn onto the topic of the girl I'd been dating for the last few months. I worry sometimes when I hear girls saying things like "I want him to be my long-term boyfriend," or when people under the age of 20 get concerned that they haven't had a serious relationship yet.
At most, it is a reliable source of advice for women who want to improve their chances with the opposite sex. No." It was clearly the first time I had even thought about it, but I knew with certainty that she wasn't the girl I was going to spend the rest of my life with. Any more time I spent with her was time I wasn't spending looking for someone I could end up with.
After I told him a little about her, he asked me a very pointed question: "Marry her? The implication in both examples is that everyone ought to have a string of relationships before settling down. With Hollywood as our vehicle, we Americans have cultivated the expectation of "dating for dating's sake." We seem to believe there is some benefit to attaching oneself emotionally to another person only to tear away again after a year or so, and then repeating the process until eventually becoming jaded, old and single.
" If I remember correctly, he actually laughed slightly as he asked the question. The truth was that I just thought she was cute, and she liked me back, so we started dating.
So be careful about how much (and which) initiative you take.
Unfortunately there is no quantifiable or simple rule here, as his threshold for embarrassment will vary in proportion to his shyness and his pride, which are different in every man. Well, for starters, in the early stages, you will need to give him blatant signs of your interest.
As the fear of the unknown dissipates with increased familiarity, a shy man's confidence in his interactions with you will rise.